Adventures of Felix the Tombstone (Co-starring: Supporting cast)
by SONICPHENG
Summary: Follow Felix Agreste the Tombstone as he tries to make it in life by being dead. "Absolute worst fanfiction I've ever read." -A probably right user. "This story sucks." -Anonymous troll. "This story taught me how to be yourself and to not conform to what the world wants me to be. Felix the Tombstone is truly inspirational." -The author disguised as a reader as she sobs quietly.


**Adrien Agreste, Gabriel Agreste and the Pouring Rain.**

They stood in black, the shine of their drenched tuxedos the only remaining light flickering amongst the two. Gabriel waited in silence, hand behind his back and glasses fogged. Under his umbrella, he looked to his son. Adrien's eyes were lifeless-forlorn.

His soul nowhere to be found.

He outstretched a hand to him, but halted it last second, turning on his heel and leaving his son be.

"I'll be waiting in the car."

And then there was one. Adrien cast his virescent emerald eyes upon the name of the inscribed on the tombstone: Felix Agreste.

The tombstone looked back, lifeless and wordless. In his eyes it was nothing more than a polished rock, carved with a dull knife. Adrien knelt before it, not sure anymore whether the sting in his eyes was from his tears or the rain.

His lips quivered as he looked to the ground. "What did you say, brother…"

The tombstone remained silent; unable to answer his brother's sorrow.

"You promised me that no matter how hard-" Adrien choked, feeling his eyes begin to burn again. He swallowed the pain as much as possible, pushing. "No matter how hard things got, it would be okay."

Silence once more from the tombstone. It wanted to speak; it wanted to reach out to Adrien and tell him it was okay, but it couldn't.

Because it was only a tombstone.

Adrien chuckled to himself, blonde locks hanging in his face. "You were always such a lone wolf… You were callous, cold and antisocial,"

It was offended.

"but I knew you were kind and actually cared for those you loved. You were my one protector…"

If Felix's tombstone could, it would have blushed here. It was true-Felix would always be the one true tsundere… Something it could no longer express. The affection of his shoving, the denials of liking someone or anything; they were impossible to live on. Adrien pegged him just right. He was cold and antisocial. He always had a cloud over his eyes, and he took it to his grave.

Adrien gave the crypt one last forced smile before rising to his feet. "Goodbye, brother." He stared lifelessly at it, turning his back with hesitance and walking away.

The Tombstone wanted to scream-it wanted to holler. It wanted to run to Adrien and tell him that Felix Agreste was not dead. ' _ADRIIEEEEEN!_ ' it thought. But what could it do? It was only a large stone. A nicely polished, overpriced and carefully hammered at stone.

That process was very painful, by the way.

And this is what it left Felix to be: a null and void rock with hammer pains.

But Felix could not leave it at this… He couldn't let them kill him off. He was too young and good-looking to die. Really-he had enough sparkles alone before _this_ happened.

The tombstone sat there in the neatly cut grass, the rain finally subsiding and giving it peace and space. It made up it's mind. It would not let fans and stories kill him off any longer.

The tombstone pushed back it's fears, and as it absorbed courage into it's soulless void, the tombstone began to shake. It tilted to one side and then to the other with all of it's might. The left side popped out of the ground. The right side followed.

The tombstone stood there in shock, turning to face the hole which it was planted in. Now empty.

It had done it. Felix's tombstone had escaped.

… That was right. They wouldn't kill him off any longer. No, they _couldn't_.

' _No more,_ ' though the tombstone. ' _No more._ '

This was his destiny. Whether dead or not, they could not confine him here. Not anymore. That's right-the tombstone would reunite with his family. He would find Adrien.

The tombstone took his first step forward, suddenly realizing it had nothing to hold him up anymore.

It fell on it's front.

* * *

 **A/N: Regret is something I do not have.**


End file.
